Lots of moms will tell you there’s nothing greater than the love you have for a child, but one mother is wondering whether that’s necessarily a good thing.

A woman wrote into Slate to ask their thoughts on the idea of “who should one love more” a spouse or your children. Apparently this woman’s husband thinks she should love him more, arguing it “provides the stable base for the family, and our partnership comes before the children.” She doesn’t necessarily agree, and thinks “no man should come before my child.”

After reading some articles that sided with the hubby she’s confused and asked for advice, with the Slate writer, noting, “It’s a bullsh*t comparison is the heft of my answer.” The writer argues that while a strong family commitment is important, they suspect that in a case of a real emergency, both parents would choose to save their children before each other.

• The writer adds that “we love people in wildly different ways,” and urges the couple to stop arguing about the subject. They note, “just do your best for each other and your children. Life is not a game show where you have to vote someone off the island,” although they then joke, “The dog comes first. That’s my true answer.”

Source: Slate